File :-(, x, )
Anonymous
SCP-001 Data File:
SCP Universal Psychiatric assessment #24201
Subject: Dr Milton Breyer
Interviewer: C. R. Armitage

All assessments are carried out in the interest and safety of all personnel. It is your duty to answer all questions, no matter how seemingly irrelevant, to the best of your ability and clarity. Participants are encouraged to ignore their interviews are under scrutiny.

Armitage: The consistency of your account will be one of the bases upon which your final review will be based. Do you understand?

Breyer: Yes, of course.

Armitage: Very well, let's begin. Tell us how the object came into being.

Breyer: Ah, but that implies the cause of its construction is identical to those of the other SCPs. You see, Agent, that it was this very object that brought every other SCP into existence.

Comment too long. Clickhereto view the full text.
>> Anonymous
wtf is this shit
>> Anonymous
Dialogues?
In SCP?
Huh.
>> Anonymous
fail attempt at securing spot for 001.
>> Anonymous
>>700370
SO FUCKING FAIL.

Even more than the Tesla device from yesterday.
>> Anonymous
SCP-001 should be a man, a normal man, whut a tweest!
>> Anonymous
B: Very well. Up until that point, the Others almost certainly had free reign on Earth. Cortez was, more or less, aware of this. So all Aztec priests with working knowledge of the object were slaughtered. The object was disassembled and Shipped in several galleons to Spain. Based on radiometric dating, the arrival of new objects slowed significantly for the 400 years it lay dormannt in Spanish archives.

A: 400 years?

B: Yes, no European in Cortez's time or thereafter had any knowledge of how to reassemble it, let alone its function. Apart from ourselves, only its creators held more orless complete working knowledge of it. Based on the 1421 hypothesis, it was almost certainly built by alchemists of the Zhang treasure fleet, in conjunction with Aztec astronomers.

A: How could this be a co-operative effort between two cultures, completely alien to one another?

B: I don't believe we have the specifics. As She is now, She has close to no knowledge of her progenitor's origin. But I understand what you mean. The Chinese possibly began with it as some sort of self-programming linguistic entity. Perhaps the core of Her existence predates the Chinese civilisation. Perhaps She predates Mankind itself. Whatever the case, She was logically the intermediary of communication.
>> Anonymous
SPC-001 IS THE FUCKING HUMAN RACE
ITS CONTAINMENT PROTOCOL IS EARTH
THE FILE NAME FOR SPC-001 IS [EXPUNGED]
>> Anonymous
SCP-001 History file; The Loss of Innocence
Date: 9-11-01
Location: Emma E. Booker Elementary School, Sarasota, Florida.

Excerpt:
As follows is the exchange between American Presidet George W. Bush and Andrew Card, White House Chief of Staff, at 0905 hours.

Card: Mr President, we have lost control of Innocence.
Bush:(Silent. Continues to read for 20 minutes)
>> Anonymous
Dumb.
>> Anonymous
what's scp-001?
>> Anonymous
>>701385
Get the FUCK out. Right now. Goddamn underage b& newfag cock-sucking homo motherfucker stupid-ass bitch
>> Anonymous
>>701393
ITT: RAAAAAAGE
>> Anonymous
>>700370
SCP-001 should not be identified. If you were planning on doing a transcript to go along with SCP-001's absence, you shouldn't have told us what it is.
>> Anonomancer !3GqYIJ3Obs
WTF is this shit? SCP-001 should be super-vague.
>> Anonymous
>>701407
Ok then.

SCP-001 is a white... thing... it's pretty big, and pretty heavy... and it does stuff...
>> Anonymous
Fuck yeah! Innocence! The original timeline is here:
http://www.editthis.info/scp_wiki/SCP-001/Proposal:Thomas1617
This is the best idea for 001 yet! (not samefag, not troll)
>> Anonymous
>>701407
SCP#001
____________________________________________________________________________________________________
__________if_______________________________________________________.
______________________________jolly pirate___________________________________________________________Ackbar_____________________________
_______________.
>> ­
>>701409
You forgot [EXPUNGED]

I always figured the reverse entropy [EXPUNGED] would have made a good SCP-001.

Anyway, this reads more like an excerpt from some New Age show on cable access than classified secrets.
>> Anonymous
>>700430
>>700430
That's really sweet. I'm glad that someone tied Innocence in with 9/11.
>> ­
>>701412
>After two weeks, the brainwashed employees of hanger 18 were shot in a raid on the hanger

wat
>> Anonymous
>>701419
So with this, the government is covering up 9/11 but becacuse the real terrorist is Innocence.
What if the War on Terror is just an excuse for the government to run around the globe cleaning up the programs that Innocence started during those two weeks?
>> Anonymous
>>701420
Innocence uses memes to take over people. She brainwashed all of hanger 18 within weeks.
>> Anonymous
>>700370
sure is neruomancer in here
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
>>701441
Gee, it sure is boring around here!
>> Anonymous
>>701448
What, not enough zombie Tesla for you?
>> Anonymous
>>701473
FOR THE LOVE OF FUCKING, IT'S NOT TESLA I GIVE A SHIT ABOUT, IT'S HIS GODDAMN UNIFIED FIELD UNIVERSAL-FUCK YOU DEVICE
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
>>701393
Stfu. You are the newfag in this bitch.
>>700430
Funny as hell.
>> Anonymous
>>701515
You are so goddamn stupid... do you even know what Innocence was?
>> Anonymous
>>701520
Freedom from sin, moral wrong, or guilt through lack of knowledge of evil?
>> Anonymous
>>701546
Oh Christ, you morons...not innocence, Innocence. Way to expose yourselves as completely new to the Internet. In b4 RAAAAAGE, BAWWWWW, and LURK MOAR
>> Anonymous
this data file sucks fucking ass.

this one is better.

>>701468
>> Anonymous
>>701500
I can't decide if this is 10/10 trolling or 0/10 newfaggotry. Either way, don't let this douche into the SCP series.
>> Anonymous
Bump to save this thread.
>> Anonymous
>>704459
>> Uber Dudditz
Tesla was a pushover, leave the universe to me!
>> Anonymous
I don't know how mystical the aztec singularity should be. It's cooler as a clockpunk analytical engine, imo.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Here's my SCP for your consideration.
>> sage
>>704459
>>704459
>>704459
>>704459
>>704459
>>704459
>>704459
>>704459
>>704459
>>704459
>>704459
>>704459
>>704459
>>704459
>>704459
>> Anonymous
>>704990

why did you have to bring homosexuality to this thread?....