Certainly would have an impact on the daily routine.

..me

>>768952
SCP series=win

>>768952
idk what it does, but let it be so.

wtf would that do, open a black hole?

That looks stunningly like a mouse, without the buttons.

On a related note, I had recurring nightmares as a child that are literally SCP-402 incarnate. Odd coincidence or a lucid insight into things to come from my childhood? Ever-expanding, all-consuming black blob... *shudders*

well, we wouldnt have to worry about global warming realy, because we would have no oceans to rise and take over the land

>>768983
>>768980

It absorbs water with little physical change itself. During tests it absorbed 4,000 kg of water in 7 minutes, gaining only 131 grams of mass.

what would happen if you ate it?

>>769019

HUURRRRRRRR

>>769023
Implosion?

>>769023

One would assume rapid, near-instantaneous mummification

are the SCP series real?

>>769035

Yes, of course.

>>769035
oh yes... very real... HURR DURR

>>769047
So far as we know..
BUM BUM BUUMM

>>769047

It's alright, agent *NAME EXPUNGED*, these people have clearance.

>>769035

Surprisingly, there is proof that they are, in fact, based at least partially on leaked information. While some of the more ridiculous ones are obviously just good imagination, at least a dozen of them have been shown to have a basis on actual phenomena occurring in now-quarantined and "black-listed" sites.

>>769050

Right. For example, I have Josie the Half-Cat sleeping on top of my computer.

>>769050
k

>>769050
thank you

>>769055
Yeah, I have that nigger bank that sings hymns when you put in a coin. lol

May someone post related links?

>>769064

The doorway which opens into hell, and whomever looks into it is driven mad by the sight of unimaginable abominations? It's in my office, I have a mini-fridge installed in there.

>>769076
http://editthis.info/scp_wiki/SCP_Series

>>769076

http://editthis.info/scp_wiki/SCP_Series

>>769086
>>769083

SCP-1072: An energy field which manifests itself as the same thought being experienced by two or more unrelated individuals, separated by great distance.

Special containment procedures: subjects are to be terminated to prevent further spread of this noxious field.

>>769078
I have the infinite devil machine in my bedroom. One hell of a fuck, mind you.

>>769093
lol great, i made one of those posts

:(

It cracks me up how the attitude of the SCP handling guidelines varies so much. Sometimes they're advising their employees not to touch an SCP cos it might sting, and letting them run around playing with amusing artifacts. Other times they're having the entire facility terminated cos one of the routine test results came back funny.

>>769095

I have this fucker in my kitchen. Gotta keep a close eye on him, or he'll get up to mischief.

http://editthis.info/scp_wiki/SCP-1021

Rick Astley is the result of a causal paradox. NIIIIIIICE

>>769119

Of course.

Not *all* SCP's are on sooper seekrit lockdown.

Like the Half-Cat, she's downright friendly. :3

http://editthis.info/scp_wiki/SCP-1012

And Cthulhu is an SCP.

http://editthis.info/scp_wiki/SCP-1020

Headcrabs too? What the hell happened to originality. Sariously

http://editthis.info/scp_wiki/SCP-722

Best one

>>769151
>769154
Both are joke SCPs.

http://editthis.info/scp_wiki/SCP-113

This would be fun to use.

Proof of existence? ? ?

>>769127

>>769247

If you look at the discussion pages et al, they were actually written as real ones first before other people realized they were ripoffs.

>>768952
Oh god the black cancer is among us. Fox Mulder was right.

Ice 9 is scarier.

>>769745
actually exists, but not as kurt vonnegut suggests. wiki tiem nao

reading number 2 now, isn't negative air pressure a stupid phrase?

i mean, presumably 0 air pressure would be a perfect vacuum, you can't really get negative.

http://editthis.info/scp_wiki/SCP-037

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK

Would take thousands of years to have an effect, the oceans are hueg.

Ice 9 on the other hand would expand and increase it's surface area of effect, so it would be much faster. This thing is tiny.

what does SCP stand for?


in before "Secret Child Porn"

>>770105

Serious child porn.

>>770105
Stupid copy pasta

Scary creepy pasta

Stupid creepy pasta

Scary copy pasta.

You decide.

>>768952
I wanna have butt secks with SCP-847

>>770125
I always thought it was "special containment procedure".

Hello people of 4chan,
I escaped from the facility several years ago, i bought a new identity, a new life, before they could possibly find me.
Most of them are people like you and me, but aren't exactly the people they maybe look like they are, there are other worker's and crewmember's in the Main Facility and other area's (E.G. Area 51, they closed it up after SCP-343 wished to move the whole facility to [DATA EXPUNGED]) remain in the facilities at all times, to maintain happiness and succesfull containment of (almost) all SCP's.
I just came here to say to watch out, there are 10 squads of Level 4 Crewmembers, trying to find an escaped convict holding SCP-402, 529 and 616.

If he has already sold/traded or given away any of the SCP's is unknown.

I love my contacts for this information. To anyone who has those SCP's (Look them up, i have limited time to tell you wich SCP-[number] is what.) Please, do whatever you want with them, but don't let them get you like they catched me, they wanted to throw me into SCP-426m who knows what they will do to you, and i doubt that you will escape like me.

Good luck.

awesome reading, well there goes my afternoon (i'm slow)

>>770138

No, and any attempt with be met with holy water, fire and gregorian chants

>>770140

You best be trolling nigger.

lawl u couldnt hold scp 402 it suck the water out of your penis :o and brain and the other 70% of your bodies